Seasonal People w/ Lifetime expectations

*Disclaimer* I know how most of yal feel about Madea and Tyler Perry and everything that goes along with it. If you could get beyond your feelings and watch this clip, there is a real message from the man in the dress.

While there are many messages in this 5 min. couch conversation the one that really sticks out to me is the misdiagnosis of people. Giving seasonal people lifetime expectations is a mistake few of us have the wisdom to avoid. This idea, in context, was more about romantic relationships, but there is something to be said for intrusting companions with the benefits of a lifelong cohort. I will admit I have more experience in forming friendships, than committed romantic relationships, and with that experience I have grown a keen ability to differentiate my branches from roots. This wisdom undoubtedly comes from being wrong a few times. In my case being wrong doesn’t always mean you cut these people out of your life completely. We all know the old saying keep your friends close, and your enemies on a leash. A lot of the people I was wrong about are still a part of my tree. It’s always better to know, and I’ve always had better relationships with people when I at least knew what to expect from them. I always felt that true disappointment only comes from being surprised. When you have people that you can form reasonable expectations for, sometimes that can be more valuable than cutting people off because of a disappointment, just to start the process all over with someone else. I know this argument sounds a lot like the disease of the ex, but romantic relationships and friendships are totally different. Friends can, and in many cases should rekindle old friendships. Like I said before at least you know what to expect from these people, whether it’s minuscule or astronomical, the expectations are there. That’s the value in friendship, experiences and time, which turn into expectations.

On the other side we have these expectations in actual romantic relationships. My 2 cents on this topic probably has the value of………..well 2 cents but I’ll give them to you anyway. (Later on, I’ll dedicate an entire entry to it) One part of his (her) rant that was particularly intriguing. He talked about stressing over these people and “in two or three years you won’t even remember their last name” I think were his exact words. I wouldn’t go as far as to say I won’t remember my exes and old hookup's last names but I do often wonder, If I saw my ex’s and old hookups from 2-3 years ago would I even be attracted to them today? Hmmm, I’ll answer that and give my two cents in a separate entry, it’s gonna take a lot of thinking for that one. 

Just a thought